S – Dearest Guides, I have been very scattered and unfocused the past few months and I don’t know why, or how to get my focus back. I wonder about my job, my career – which way am I supposed to go with it?  Also, I was recently in contact with someone from my past who I had an intense, spiritual connection with. We communicated and confirmed that it was a series of misunderstandings that lead to our separation. However now I am with someone else, whom I love and care deeply about, and have a wonderful life with. Why did I learn about the misunderstandings now – what purpose does it serve? And why am I so drawn to C? I know our connection is one of many lifetimes…are we meant to ever be together in this one?  Thank you for any insight you can provide.  Namaste

Dear, dear blessed being.  For much of your life path you believed you were choosing for your own growth, but are now wondering if you were fulfilling other people’s needs from the effect of parents, from the effect of others in your life’s path with expectations that you must seek and be something they think you to be.  But now you stand in a place of wonder, is this fulfilling to me?  Do I continue on this path?  Do I take more education in one direction or the other and where do I fit in all of this?

In fact, what you are asking blessed one is: Who am I?  What mark do I wish to leave upon this sphere?  You’ve always had wonderful, lofty thoughts and yet have tried to make it into something concrete.  The artistic side of you has so much to express and often feels very anxious when you tried to make it fit into one little box in order to achieve some goal that you have never really believed you wanted to achieve.

And who is this being that you have been with?  It was a joyful time and yet there were difficulties, each growing, pulling, stretching, expectations of one another.  You often mirrored back that that you learned early in life, the  expectations.  There were times you even feared that you were becoming like your mother and that one becoming like…well, someone you could not possibly be with.  The expectations upon you were so heavy, you could not breathe.

After the time and the clarity of course, both of you could come together after many lifetimes, bittersweet, drawn, and yet now each of you made choices in other places, other opportunities of growth.  There is a promise at hand with that one.  You know this.  It is not some surprise.  You know a part of you would like to dance off and be with that one in sheer bliss and happiness. But life is not a constant sheer bliss and happiness, dear one, as there would be difficulties and problems.  Even with the one you choose now to be with, that you choose to be with, the love is so gentle, supportive and you are even frustrated with that one.

But this is what a life’s path is, opportunites for growth. You are far too young to think that it should only be one way.  Not so much with the love, but with yourself.  Allow yourself some freedom at this time to truly explore who you be.  Choices.  Examine that each element of a life’s path involves a choice.  A choice that changes and alters until the truth be known to you.  You wonder if you are torturing yourself being with this one, thinking of another one, or torturing yourself by not being with that one and by being with this one. You often think your mind is your own personal, well, hell truly does exist in the physical world.   It is in these great states of great confusion that it exists, a place where you feel you are not growing, a place where only questions have answers of you.

Fear not, blessed one, you are not in hell. You have a beautiful mind that is very creative and has much yet to do.  But take some time to allow just for fun, for joy, for laughter.  Play.  Play right now and listen to your heart’s song for your mind does work overtime.  Your heart will tell you what you need to do.  There are opportunities coming up for you where things will be much clearer.   Bless you my child.  Bless you, for I know you well and love you dearly.