I only wanted an apology or a show of empathy from the group as a whole for the way I was treated as moderator. Hindsight is 20/20. I see many places where I could have ended my postion, but I thought doing so would make them think it was ok for me to be mistreated with no redress. It ended up with me being threatened and publicly banned. I did not see this as the end result nor was this what was desired. I do know that I did not speak my truth enough, but not sure that it would have made a difference. I thought I knew enough to avoid this.
What do I need to do to restore my reputation now? Is there anything that I can do, if I should, to reconcile with those people? Could those people have done me harm? My toughest task will be avoiding blaming, criticizing, and judging myself for this experience and avoiding going into a depression over it. This has really hurt me. It seems like my actions led me to being hurt further even though that was not the intent of my actions.
It is presented as if everything was my fault. Someone people threatened to reveal my private information basically threatening my safety and perhaps my life. I feel afraid to report it since they can still act on the threat if I do. What should I do? The group publicized information to ruin my reputation. How should I best deal with that? Should I get a lawyer? What do I need to do to restore my reputation? I want to take the best course of action for myself. Thank you.
The guide’s response:
Firstly, blessed one, know where you are and where you have come from. I am not surprised that you are somewhat surprised even at your own actions. You have launched forward into a truth that is part of you, but you do not feel secure in yet. Take your time. You have moved in your mind very quickly, but those that surround you have not.
They still have you as a being of submission, a rather quiet one living a quiet life. You shocked them. They wanted you to return to that that you were. You no longer can be that that you were. You cannot unlearn what you have learned. You cannot undo actions that you have taken as they have heightened your soul. You are richer now.
This fear that you sense is an old fear, one that belongs long ago, not now. Breathe deep and realize that nobody wants to harm you. And the only harm they can do is if you fear them. For the fear that you create causes you chaos in your mind and you start to not to trust the virtue of this and you start to doubt your own heart. Do not do this, blessed one.
You could seek time away where you could just stand tall. You know the old saying “words cannot hurt you.” They will not touch your soul of love. Yes, these people are now aware that there is this beacon of light amongst them and they may fear you. Soften that fear with gentle words of who you be. You are loved, you needn’t fear.