The heart’s voice in a love relationship

PF asks, “Why does b.b.r. choose to ignore his feelings for me. His behavior has been extremely confusing and I am having difficulty letting it all go. I think some of his choices have to do with money and social status. Some insight will help greatly and would be deeply appreciated. Thank you.”

Perhaps if both of you would stop trying to be someone you are not, there could be some truth. But each is so concerned about not allowing the other to see the whole of who they be. There is nothing to hide, my dearest one. This is what causes the difficulties. Truth, hand to hand, heart to heart. This is what you need to do. Have moments of truth. Speak from your heart, not from your mind. That would be less talking, more action.

Would this be good advice for everyone in a relationship?

Always when there is a relationship of love, it is very important to remember the voice of the heart. Sometimes it gets buried underneath so many different platitudes, and attitudes, understandings and theories, that is what has happened here: too much thinking, not enough heart. My love to you.

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  1. Anonymous August 28, 2009 at 9:49 pm - Reply

    Hello. I am in a relationship with someone that I have known my entire life, as childhood friends. We had a very brief fling at 20, didn’t see each other for approximately 18 yrs and now at 40, he found me & we have been involved in a relationship for just over a year. He was a very “bad” boy at 20 yrs. old & after a disastrous alcoholic marriage & 6 yrs of single parenthood, it took some convincing for me to even accept a date with him. I have found him to be surprisingly romantic, caring, attentive & fabulous with my children. He makes all of the promises that I have ever wanted to hear. With my need for attention & affection, I found myself quite smitten. Along the way this past year there have been some behaviours that have hurt me & have led me to feel that this relationship can not be. Now, I feel very shut down & am not clear as to how I feel about him. Am I protected & scared or is this relationship not meant to be? I do not trust my feelings at all & really can not discern my feelings. Is this a part of working through some “stuff” in a relationship or am I way too willing to “cut & run”? I want to be in a relationship, be a family. I did not like being single, nor wa i good at it. I attracted all the wrong men or was attracted to them, more acurately. Here I have this good man & am floundering still…….

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