Since babies need to bond to the initial caregiver, the mother, and such failure to bond is devastating and tragic for the child, why is there no automatic natural back up plan to prevent a detachment disorder when this bonding fails due to neglect, abuse, or moving to foster care, or for whatever reason?

The attachment disorder that results has such a severe impact on the infant’s life through adulthood to the point where, in the severest of cases, there is no conscience or remorse in causing harm to another. It is horrific, a pure evil, that a person suffers and struggles so to find his way with much pain and heartache. What is the initial cause, the evil, that causes a mother to not love her child as needed? I know that that mother’s mother may not have loved her as needed and so on and so forth generationally but what was the initial or primal cause that set off the chain reaction?

Since this occurrence is so devastating to the child/adult, crippling social bonding throughout the remainder of its life, how can it be prevented and also healed if not prevented? Many times the child growing into an adult has had so many negative experiences following the rejection by the mother that life experiences reinforce the rejection that the child/adult feels. Moreover, the adult grows tired after so many attempts of establishing friendships and those friendships not lasting, of walking on eggshells, not speaking up for fear of angering someone, fearing people, and being misunderstood or flat rejected because of not fitting in.

Did the spirit know it would experience such a path ahead of birth? I see no good in such a path of attachment disorder. It is pure evil and no good comes from the disorder. It puts the child at an extreme disadvantage at handling life experiences and thriving. How in the world can such a one be expected to behave the same and have the same sense of security as those who were loved? I feel angry, hurt, and sad that this has happened because I know the pain and I know how hard I have tried over the many years but still tend to isolate even though I know it is better to make connections. How can you expect someone to see the world through the eyes of love when their experiences lacked love? How can you expect someone to open her heart when she has been hurt from having it open? It is like a boulder has been chained to the child/adults neck and they are required to run the race with those who do not have an inhibiting boulder around their neck. How can you win????????

I don’t want to have rage or anger but my challenges placing me at such a disadvantage and in a tremendous struggle while seeing others, who do not have attachment disorder, go on to thrive and do naturally that which comes hard for me, makes me feel angry!

Since God loves me, why did he not protect me from this? Is he powerless to protect me from such? Do I have unrealistic expectations of God? Is my understanding of God so flawed?