A child’s fixation on routines

Kristine asked about her son Robert and his need to have fixed routines. This was the response.

A radiant young man. What he does is totally normal and understandable. Young beings often want to control their whole universe and all the beings in it. They feel they are the centre of the universe and thus control it. And at this point when he is going out into the world and is somewhat fearful of the unknown for he doesn’t truly know it all, although he feels he does at this point. He will try to control all small things, and even the parents and other siblings.

What mother must do is reassure at every turn that he is loved. That he is the child and she is the mother and she will always protect him and keep him safe. He must feel from both his parents that everything is steady and secure, that their bonds are good and strong, and that everything is solid at home. And then he will have the wings to fly, and not feel he must control everything. He will always be somewhat of a fuss budget, but nothing that she needs to worry about. In fact, be full of laughter about it and even bring him to laughter and understanding that this is just him. Tell her it doesn’t mean he has a learning difficulty.

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