t’s not about fitting their mould; it’s about being who he needs to be, Jane Kennard, Circles Within Circles

It’s not about fitting their mould; it’s about being who he needs to be

Help for parents of a gentle young boy who struggles at school

My six-year-old nephew is so intelligent, wise and sensitive, yet struggles at school and needs to be pushed to studying. Is it all too much for him? What is it with his daydreaming? What is his purpose and how can I best help him and his parents?

Oh my goodness, yes, a very highly intelligent, gentle, sweet soul this being is. What to do for this one is to always to give great support and strength and try not to give too many things that cause worry for this one. For even though you might think he is not absorbing or hearing all things, he does so very much. What’s called daydreaming often is this one just trying to stay grounded in this world. He finds it very, very confusing from time to time and thus gives himself a little retreat by taking off to a place of calm and quiet.

These beautiful parents are very high-strung and very nervous and want this one to shine so radiantly and thus they put a great deal of pressure upon this little one.  He is a kind and gentle one who will do a great deal—but you must give him his own ability to do it. It’s not about following rules or fitting into the mould that others expect of him. It is about being who he needs to be.

He is an extremely artistic child and needs to find ways of expression, but he is very much a perfectionist. Because of his parents, I must say; they are kind of wanting him to do everything right the first time. So he is a little bit limited in putting out something that they might think is not perfect.  He is so very little in body, but big in spirit. He wants very much to cause them to not have any stress or strain.

He struggles at school and needs to be pushed to study.

Isn’t that ridiculous, pushed to study at six years of age. Oh for heaven’s sake. Oh don’t worry about that. It’s not really causing him a great deal of stress. They can do all they need to do with pushing; he’ll do what he needs to do as well.

Make sure there’s lots of communication, lots of talking. This little one is very fearful of speaking what is needed inside, and often doesn’t feel he has the right words to say it. Give him lots of opportunity to say how he’s feeling, even if you create books or a story with a happy face and a sad face, just little things–nothing with a great deal of pressure. Don’t sit him down and put the light on him and start questioning him. Just let it all be fun. And often times, especially with the male creature, it’s better if you don’t face them but sit beside him. Side to side so that way you can just have a conversation, and he’ll find it much easier to talk about things.


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