Confusion about cancer and how to proceed

Sandra says, “I was given a diagnosis of breast cancer Sept 07. I have opted to “treat” it alternatively and by seeing this as an incredible opportunity to grow and learn. It isn’t always easy but in a dream, I saw it this way and I also saw a doctor doing a procedure on me where my body wasn’t mutilated but minuscule samples were removed from my breast and lymph system. Well I found a doctor who does just this! My appointment with him was to be Jan 08. What followed were 2 years of postponements (he had the flu, his mother was in a horrific hurricane accident then died, machines breaking down, etc,) and then on he died of lung cancer.
Although I have never physically met this doctor, I feel like we know each other. I have talked to him in dreamtime and Sunday, not knowing he had died, I told him in a dream that I would do my best to be at his funeral if he thought it beneficial. I do not remember an answer. Is there meaning in all of this? I am feeling so sad and also discombobulated.  Please, if there is any guidance to help me learn, or understand. Sometimes I wonder if I truly don’t require any surgery. What is it about cancer that someone like him dies and yet I feel fine?  Or am I fooling myself? Am I in denial? He had all the best medical care and I am looking at old emotions, old eating habits, developing spiritually. Oh dear, confusion!

This blessed being is feeling very cut off from the world. She has often felt adrift of it. More so because one she seeks has left her again. She is a very old soul and is confused as to why this has been created within her body.  She needs to dwell upon her own being and its happiness.   She has been so serious and she would even say this is true.  She has been finding it hard to laugh and when the laugher came, it was not truth, it was to make others comfortable.  So often feeling invisible in amongst others, not feeling part of things.

Blessed one, if you want to stay, make your presence known. Be that, that you are. Be conscious in body. Allow others to see the deep, emotional being that you are that you have hidden so well. Will this heal you? It will be the beginning. And in time you will know exactly what to do. There is not any one method. When you are truly conscious you will know what is right and what will do the trick.

First published on the “old” blog February  18, 2010

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