BJ – How I wish I could undo the things I’ve said and done in a moment of fear. I come to you once again for guidance. I have learned to listen to my intuitive side and rarely has it misled me. However, I recently ended a friendship with a man who captured my heart only to break it when I asked for more than he was able to give me, a committed relationship. And so I’m picking up the pieces of my broken heart and venturing forth through another healing. While I know that growth comes through some adversity the pain doesn’t seem to get easier. I believe that we had a promise between us that we were to be together and we had a beautiful chemistry/connection that could only be felt from a past lifetime, why then was he not able to make a commitment?
What happens when a promise is not kept, will we meet in another lifetime perhaps and fulfill this task or will it always be unfinished? I can’t help but wonder if the timing had been different might this have had a desired outcome? He has asked me to move forward with my life and I have no choice but to do just that. It is however with sadness and thoughts of what might have been a wonderful last few chapters in our lifetime together on this planet. My love for him is till in my heart and always will be.
Oh dear, dear, blessed one, how hurtful. How unkind he was. I am not surprised that you are in deep pain and mourning for that that you thought would be. When a promise is incomplete there is deep pain. And when one is in a state of no growth there is no changing or doing anything to change that.
You see, when two beings have a promise together both must do their part in order for it to be completed, or fulfilled. This did not occur. It does not mean that there won’t be a time in which his promise will be completed, but it may not be with you. It may be with someone else for you have learned this part of the promise and now are greater than what you were.
You are willing to love, to be loved. To stand in the light of love is a brave state when one has been so confused by the actions of others. You have given up a great deal of your happiness for the happiness of others. That is why this is more hurtful than ever.
But the emptiness is on your part. You are unfulfilled in many ways, blessed one. But then, you do not ask for yourself. In your asking, you are also telling that you are still back there where that was, instead of moving forward. And you will be there until the place no longer fits, where you no longer feel that great draw to see him. to know where he is, to know who he is seeing, when you feel just fine with loving him and being; for you will understand that you love many and you can still be strong in that light. Ask for a partner in life that gives and takes in a balanced, wholesome way.
There are many fears in that being that you have no time, nor place in your life for. Be at peace with this that it is complete. It is not a matter of healing from it. It is a matter of being within it. When pain occurs it means the body has been under great stress from it.
So, give yourself some time. But find those you enjoy to be with that love and laugh and let go. Let your being be the light that it is. Embrace that pain and embrace that love that was and let go of that that hurt you.
It may seem impossible at this time, because you are not yet willing. That is the first stage of forgiveness. And then you will forgive him and yourself for being vulnerable. And then you will embrace the wondersof being vulnerable and what a grace it gives you to love, to be.
You are an amazing being with so much to offer. I would not say that he is the one that lost, but he has not grown. I judge not, but know that you are an amazing gift to your world and all that you give to.
Promises unfulfilled, they are not a comfortable state to be in but know that your side of it is fulfilled so you can move on. It is not a judgment, it is a fact.
Be in the light my child, for you are of it.