Nicole suffers from severe anxiety. She says, “It is so bad that it is as if I cannot think, I cannot slow down enough to do anything right. I freeze, I can’t take directions, can’t do math, nothing…. Why am I like this? Furthermore, how to I become more calm and down to earth so I can function? I am afraid to drive even, because I get lost and confused so easily. I wasn’t always like this…I want to take my place in society, what do I do to be able to calm down and function? It’s like my brain doesn’t work. Please help me if you can.”
The guide’s response:
Dear one, firstly, I want you to understand that you create the body, the reality of that that you walk in. To understand and grasp this might be difficult, but not impossible, for you are a very highly intelligent being. Partially, this is why you are so highly tuned and many times feel the anxiety of others; it is not always your own. So if you understand the fact that you create this world you can understand the fact that you can create it without this anxiety.
You came into the physical world with two beings that did not have a lot of time to give you the attention, but you heard very much the conditions under which they lived and worked and you tried to manifest an understanding in order to control and make yourself feel safe and comfortable. This, as you grew, became your armour as if something you created to know that you felt comfortable in. But you were using the adult understanding within the child understanding, which does not work when you become an adult. It then becomes something of a fearful state–of being highly attuned to all beings and all things around you and not so much your own being. This is very similar to the conditions when you were a child. Your being was not brought forward and understood; you were put to the back and everything else was more important. This is what is occurring now. You are a very intuitive being and you are tuning in to all things around you to the point that you have almost disappeared.
Are you saying that when she was in her family of origin with her parents that she spent most of her energy and time thinking about what they wanted from her and how she should be and not enough attention to how she was inside, to her own needs?
Yes, not enough attention to learn to be in the physical body.
And now that she is an adult she is still in the habit of putting so much attention to everyone’s feelings and wishes?
Yes. And she has developed an amazing intuitive ability to sense everyone’s angst and conditions and fear, and this is complicated by the fear of the child that is still very much present in the evolutionary process of the physical body. It is as if the child is still stuck back there not understanding who and how to be in this body.
I see, because she didn’t have the opportunity of fully finding that out. So what can she do about it?
You have to begin by first understanding that you create this situation, so…
And how does she create it?
She created it as a child trying to make peace with everyone as to not cause any disturbance. She felt that if they truly knew what she felt that they would be unhappy with her and she would not be accepted. It is still the same. She feels there is something wrong with her but is very afraid to tell anyone. She is very much stuck in a place of no growth and that is how this feels in the physical body.
How to begin to change this is to truly understand that you aren’t going to die from this. As time goes by this anxiety does diminish as you cannot stay in that high pitch all of the time. It is exhausting for your body. So when this feeling arises in you, in the very moments of it, stop, take a deep breath and remember that little girl that was very afraid. Breathe deeply into your body. Love that little girl and tell her that she is doing fine. It is almost like you are going to be two beings–the adult and the child for yourself. Speak gently, lovingly to yourself for you are a beautiful being full of life and love and joy wanting to share it with all.
When you feel there are so many conditions and unaccepted ways about you—remind yourself that you know it is not true. That it is an old, old, old way of being from a long-ago time that no longer fits you. That is why there is great fear. Breathe and wait for a few moments. Don’t run away and don’t change anything. If you are in the process of something, just be still, or pull to the side and do whatever you need to just be still. Know that you are fine. You have to talk yourself back to being the adult, being alright, that you are fine. It is a matter of telling the conscious mind.
You see, you are several minds in the physical world: the spirit mind, the conscious mind, the subconscious–all of these different parts. The conscious mind now believes that you cannot do these things, but your subconscious is still a child thinking that you are fearful and the spirit mind knows you can do all of these things and you will be fine. This is why there is confusion in your physical world–it is not surprising. But your spirit mind shines through because you are a very evolved being, so speak to yourself that you will be able to do this. In time, you will find it quite funny that you are feeling this way.
Don’t tackle all things at one time. Take it bit by bit. You might find it very comforting to find a therapist or a manager of the emotions to hear you and not judge you and help you through this process. You must choose to release yourself from these old thoughts that no longer fit. They didn’t fit then either, but the fact was you were a child and no one was around to help you around it. So, blessed one, you can release yourself from this anxiety. Yes, you can take vitamins and different pills and things but they will only help mask it until you embrace this as being a wonderful part of you. You are loved little one, don’t be afraid.