Moving on from a past relationship

Sandy writes, “I have been separated from my husband of 17 years for more than a year now and recently met a man who I feel I could spend the rest of this life with. We seem so much more comapatible than my ex and I were, in every way. But I am afraid of being hurt again, afraid things will change as they did in my previous relationship. Should I trust this new love? I feel I am holding something back because of my fear…how can I let it go?”


Well, firstly my dear, you are healing yourself very well, but it is not complete yet.  Do not think that one can completely erase one’s path in a time of healing. You integrate it into who you are.   If you have grown and learned from something, then you have moved forward and it shall not need to be repeated.   If you have not made choices that were growing and helpful to your being, there may be a necessity to repeat them.

This is something that is not complete yet.  You say you have separated, but you are still very attached in your thoughts and your thinking with your first mate and this is very much still present.  So the new partner that you are with is sort of a magical, wonderful thing and you feel you cannot even discuss all of that as you must hide a part.  What I am saying is give yourself some time.  Do not expect it all to be completely forgotten, and do not expect this new one to be perfect.  There are all sorts of different parts of you now.  Take time to see who you are in this place and time.  Have you healed?  Does it mean it is forgotten?  No, the question is: Did I learn?  Did I share a responsibility for my learning?  Dearest one, you will do fine.

By | 2017-05-28T12:53:28+00:00 August 21st, 2010|Categories: Love relationships|0 Comments

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  1. HL August 22, 2010 at 9:03 am - Reply

    I have had one broken marriage earlier & am separated in the second marriage too, for the last 2 years now. All this time, there has been lot of hurt, pain & clashes due to verbal exchanges & communications, with my second husband. Although my husband has been persistent to get me back into his life, but experiencing his ways of living, drinking habit, emotional outbursts, I am very scared to re-unite. Please guide me if divorce is the only solution or is there any chance of re-conciliation?

  2. kp August 22, 2010 at 11:14 am - Reply

    My dear guides…can you comment on the resolution I am presently completing with my former husband ? And, would you acknowledge my feelings for E…is there an old , familiar friend in him or ??? I love the blog and am very grateful for all that my precious friends are doing with you.

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