Nighthawkof writes, “First off I want to thank the guides. It has been an immense help for me during this stage I do still have some questions. I think she is worth waiting for. I feel a very strong bond between us, not sure if the word soul mate applies or even exists but the bond, at least for me is very deep. I know she needs to develop or learn or experience something during this time and I am making a conscious effort to let go of her to be able to do so. It is hard and the direction she has chosen to explore is extremely painful for me to watch. I still am trying to be supportive, sometimes it feels as if she is slipping away completely though.
For a long time I thought that love or a relationship was something that I was not capable of and I am learning or starting to learn that this is not so. At least I think I am. I am holding on to the hope that we at some point can work through this and by learning and developing on our own, we can grow back together again. I also see the point of me needing to learn worth and loving myself. And yes there are a lot of shields and I am again very consciously trying to dismantle those. Although it is at the moment very difficult to do so because of the situation and my reaction to the feelings involved. I hope the guides can maybe point out where I should be headed to. I get the feeling that my life is falling apart.
Dearest being of light, you seek very much that that you believe is love. But you do not love your own being. Start by being first, the being of light that you know you are. Return the light to your own being. I know you seek companionship and a union with that intellect, but it is the union to your own heart that you need to connect to. Be the child and seek from a different viewpoint at this time. Step away from your path and look upon yourself. In truth, this being is offering you a great gift of growth as well. To realize many of your understandings were not your truth. They were a concoction of what you believed to be the truth. Oh no, you did not do this out of a negative place. Your compassion is wondrous. Have it for your being now. Take time to heal you now. Do not have expectation of anything that is yet to be, but be.
Truly, blessed one, a partnership does not make you whole. You make you whole. Partnerships create new energies and new bonds, but if the whole or the beginning of the being is not whole or balanced, there will be many rocky times ahead in any partnership. This is a time of healing for you. Take it as a gift to yourself. See it not as a negative. No one is slipping away. You need to be in touch with you by connecting to your heart.
You have a strong mind and creative ability to visualize, to move beyond where your feet stand. Connect to your heart, dear one. Feel the heart’s very deep emotions from early in this life. See how you have longed to have the connection with others that you have never had with yourself. Bonding has been difficult for you. This is what you need to address, to see. You could do this through meditation, through counsel, through self-communication. I believe you could create this. Your intellect has the ability to talk yourself through this. But talk to a heart that may have the mind of a three year old, a five year old, a thirteen year old. It is all part of you blessed one. It is all calling out now, as if clinging. That is why you feel this urgency that you are about to lose something. No. You are about to find you. Your processes in the physical world must be your choice for it is your growing, your time of learning. So seek them, speak of them to other beings. They will help you for they will speak of how they found their way. Do not feel that you are a failure if you feel you need to ask for help. Failure is the greatest place to start to grow.