I was wondering why I’ve been having so much difficulty breathing lately? I even ended up in hospital and had quite a scary experience, but was told I was just having an intense anxiety experience or attack. I enjoy deep breathing and experience the in and out of breath as a blessing and comfort so this experience is very challenging for me. I also practice meditation morning and night, but it doesnt seem to be possible at the moment. Probably a blessing in disguise for me, as I have lived with a lot of anxiety and loneliness for quite some time. I should not have expected to live my life like this for so long without causing some damage to my health. Maybe I really need to talk to somebody and open up but I wouldn’t know where to start. I was wondering if you could offer some kind words and advice as I have benefited from your loving guidance before. Thank you so much once again!
The guide’s response
Dear, dearest one, you have created a prison for yourself. The secrecy of your thoughts and actions now hold you so restricted, that you fear so deeply the normal actions of being in a body. You know deeply within you that you need to speak, to release this burden that you weigh yourself down with.
Gentle one, you need to find joy and laughter. You walk around removed from your world. It’s not surprising you feel separate from it. And you have to ask yourself why you choose to harm your being. Why would you want to cause destruction to this beautiful body? It is there that you need to seek your understanding. Find a being to trust, who will not judge, who will not try to do the work for you. But you will be able to hear your words and understand many things about your being. You created rituals that were comforting for a while but now have become restricting.
You say you’re very nervous, but you are filled with fear. Fear of doing something wrong, that there is some criteria of being. There isn’t dearest one. Let me help you by telling you that you returned to this life out of the normal harmony of the usual state. Thus you came in to be with many beings that you are not familiar or feel very safe with. Out of step otherwise.
It doesn’t mean you’re in the wrong place, it just means it’s a little bit more difficult for you to find one you feel comfortable and familiar with. So you must seek that being–perhaps through a counselor or someone of great trust. Explain to them what you must seek, that you fear that they will judge, for this will help them to not judge you.
Your world whirls around you. Your conscious mind takes hold, up and down, back and forth, trying to find places to hide who you are. Take a deep breath, a breath of love and light. Trust that you have the strength to do this. And speak. Tell all things, even those that you believe are very negative. And you’ll find when you release this burden that you will find joy, blessed one. You will find laughter and ease–of both breath and belief. And you will release those iron bars that you have put yourself in. And you’ll know that the structure you need in your path is simply to allow this amazing world to love you, and you it. That is what you’ve been doing blessed one—keeping love away. I love you and I am there for you.
Ask for assistance from those that surround you, both in the physical world and the world of spirit. I love you. Bless you, my dear.